Apres break-up

"Do you want a drink?"

"No, I don't want a drink, Ted. I'm here. Do you have my stuff?"

"Could we just talk for a minute?"

"About what?"

"About what? What about us? Can't we just, I mean..."

"No. Look, I came. I'm here. Talk if you want, but we're..."

"Come on, how can you just be done like that?"

"How can I? How can I just be done like that? Seriously?"

"No, I mean..."

"Seriously? You're going to ask me that?"

"Wait, wait..."

"Because, shit, I didn't even want to come here tonight. You can keep the fucking CDs, Ted, I don't..."

"No, wait, wait, come on. Wait. Sit down. Please. Please."

"I'll stay for five minutes. You wanna talk, talk."

"That doesn't even... okay, okay, wait. Gimme a second."

"Five minutes."

..."I'm sorry. I'm sorry, okay?"

"How many times are you gonna say that, Ted? You think that's going to fix things?"

"No, but I, I just wanted to say it again. I'm sorry. Look, it's just the way I..."

"Fuck that. We already had this conversation. I don't need to sit here for four more minutes just to hear the same fucking thing I've already heard from you."

"Jesus, I don't know what to say! What the fuck can I say!? I'll try to..."

"How many second chances do you think you should get, Ted?"

..."I tried. I did. I'm sorry. I'll try again..."

"And again. And again. Because it's been months, Ted. I'm done. I'm tired. Tired of you, tired of your friends, tired of all your bullshit and waiting at home for you and not knowing if I'm going to see you or..."

"No, no, I can..."

"Or whether you're going to ditch me or take me to go hang out with your fucking stoner buddies again..."

"Hey, wait, hold on..."

"Or whatever the fuck, Ted. Amy has been telling me to break up with since the first month, and I never listened to her. You know how many chances I've given you? How many fucking times do we need to have the same conversation? I'm so fucking tired of all this bullshit. No, I'm done. I'm fucking done, Ted."

"Please, Ellie, please... look, come on, just..."

"Just what, Ted? What..."

"I just! Shit! Fuck. Please. Just... just come back. Please. I can't. I don't know what to... do. I mean... I just... I... please. Look... I know... I know I haven't treated you well. I know... that... you don't like my friends. That..."

"It's not that I don't like them. I like them just fine, I just don't want to spend every waking moment with your friends from college."

"No, I know. I know. Could we... look, I can change. I haven't gone out with D or Sammie for a couple of weeks. I..."

"When's the last time you smoked?"

"What?"

"Come on. You heard me."

"When I smoked? I mean, last night, I guess."

"Jesus."

"No, but I mean, it wasn't anything, I was just watching tv, you know..."

"It's not gonna work, Ted. You're not gonna stop smoking for me. Your friends are one thing, but smoking's..."

"You want me to quit smoking?"

"Did you never listen to me?"

"But... no, I mean, yeah, we talked about me smoking less, but you never said you wanted me to stop."

"Are you kidding? You smoke so much you can't... you can't fucking get it up. I need someone who can get an erection from time to time, Ted. So, yeah, I never said I wanted you to quit, but you also said you'd smoke less so we could have sex sometime. And that didn't happen, so yeah, now I'm saying quit."

"I can't... no, I mean... you can't ask me to just quit. Cold turkey. I'm not gonna do that."

"'bye, Ted."

"No! I mean, I'll cut way back. Seriously. I swear to god."

"Not good enough. Look, I'm done. Come on, I'm not even mad anymore. We're done, Ted. Say goodbye and I'm gonna go."

"Please, Ellie. Please. Okay. Look, I'll quit. I'll quit. I'm done."

"Say goodbye, Ted."

"No, Ellie, come on, you can't just end it like this..."

"Goodnight, Ted. Goodbye."

"Ellie! Ellie! Fuck! Fuck..."